To Be Born
by God of Insanity
Summary: With a distant father, an absent mother, and a good friend, young Sesshoumaru believes himself to be all alone in the world...but is he really? FOR MATURE READERS ONLY! YAOI! M/M Nar/Sess


**"To Be Born"**

by: _**God of Insanity**_

Summary: _With a distant father, an absent mother, and a good friend, young Sesshoumaru believes himself to be all alone in the world...but is he really?_ **FOR MATURE READERS ONLY!**

Pairing(s): NarakuSEME/SesshoumaruUKE

Chapter Warning(s): Pre-Canon, One-Shot, Angst, Yaoi, M/M, Lemon, Death, SesshUKE, NarakuNICE, Oral, Anal, Attempted Suicide, OOCness, Character Death, Minor(implied)

Word Count: 14,064

_**A/N**_:** Challenge fic for Pineapple55. I decided to do a one-shot to get me back into writing. For some reason, this was hard to write. I guess it's because I haven't been writing for awhile. I hope he likes it. . **

**INI-HERIT: Don't worry, I'm working on the next chapter! I want to thank all of you who have reviewed it, but I want to thank LordOfTheWest for being so patient with me! And for my other stories, I plan on rereading, editing, and most likely continuing them. Thanks for your thoughtful reviews and support, guys!**

**Note to FLamers: I like my Sesshoumaru to be an uke and if you don't, then you don't have to read my stories. Naraku makes a sorry ass uke BUT Sesshoumaru makes an awesome one. So if you complain about that, it will fall on deafly insane ears. ****If you don't like them being OOC in any way, that's too bad. Pineapple55 gave me permission to do so, so nyah nyah boo boo!**

_Disclaimer(s):_ _I do not own any of the InuYasha characters nor do I make any profit. This is just purely for the enjoyment of the readers._

* * *

He watched her with unwavering eyes as she swept herself away like a parting breeze. The demoness who bore such a striking resemblance to him was departing for good, this time. He could feel it deeply in his very bones that she was never going to return back to them, to him. Where most others would find that shocking and insulting, he did not. He understood why she was leaving. She was escaping.

The young demon stood outside bathed in the moonlight as he watched his mother's retreating form become smaller and smaller until only the glimmer of her silver hair was visible. And then she was gone.

Sesshoumaru was still young yet and by the human equivalent, he would be considered about 12 years old, although in demon years he was well over a century old. He'd always been a quiet, but highly intelligent child that wanted nothing more than to please his father. He cared more than his aloof manner let on and that was why most mistook him for apathetic.

He turned away and saw his father, tall and imposing as ever, standing stock-still very much like a statue. Their amber eyes met each other and neither said nothing. It was the silence that spoke the loudest.

Surprisingly enough, it was Inu no Taishou who broke the eye-contact first. Truth be told, looking into his son's eyes was what he imagined looking into a god's gaze may feel like. For as strong and invincible as Touga was made out to be by the tales of his conquests, he indeed had his own weaknesses.

With the slightest of nods, Touga turned away and returned to his castle.

The silence of the rest of the night was almost as strong as the absence of a mother.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The following morning, the young youkai found himself wandering almost aimlessly through the forest that surrounded his father's palace. It was quiet and peaceful despite the chirping birds and the scuttling of smaller animals. He didn't mind, though.

With a sigh, he finally reached his destination, which was an enormous hollowed out tree. Strangely enough, even though the tree was pretty much mostly hollow on the inside, it was still miraculously alive. If the bright green leaves weren't evidence of that, than nothing else was.

In some ways, whenever he looked at that hollow tree, it reminded him of himself at times.

The inu youkai knocked on the tree about twenty-seven times in a specific pattern and then almost immediately, a door popped open. He closed the door behind him as he slipped inside the vacant tree. Even though it was pitch black inside the tree, it didn't take long for his acute eyes to adjust to the stark darkness. There was a bed, a table, and a couple of chairs to sit in. There was also a comfortable looking hammock that hung high above the other furniture. Apparently the tree's interior was far roomier than it appeared to be from the outside.

Yet there was no sign of anyone besides Sesshoumaru in the tree.

He sighed and his eyelids slid shut for a moment when a familiar scent drifted into his nostrils.

His eyes flew open the moment he heard an amused chuckle. "Where are you?"

"Come and find me, Sesshoumaru," whispered a seductive voice that was obviously male. There was a playful edge to the tone of his voice that implied that he was teasing the young demon.

With an almost inaudible shaky sigh, the stubborn youkai closed his eyes once again. "No, I will not. I do not feel like playing games right now, Naraku."

Sesshoumaru nearly jumped when he felt two long, strong arms snake around him, pulling him in tight against a larger, harder body. That familiar, welcome scent was all around him now and he relaxed against that body with his golden eyes half-lidded.

"That is such a shame, Sesshoumaru. What if I want to play with you?" Naraku purred, his voice low and mischievous.

"Then I say it sounds like a personal problem, my friend." Sesshoumaru retorted and slapped one of the hands that tried to tickle him.

"Ouch. Now I find it a paradox that you can be so cold to me when you're body feels so warm, Sesshoumaru."

The younger male rolled his eyes and turned around to regard his older friend. Naraku was tall and already stood around six feet tall. He wasn't fully grown yet and physically appeared to be an adolescent. His skin was pale, but not as pale as Sesshoumaru's. His eyes were as crimson as fresh blood and his long, wavy black hair was as dark as calligraphy ink. Anyone with eyes would say that he was attractive in the tall, dark, and handsome way.

It was his blood red eyes that gave away the fact that he had demon lineage. He was a hanyou, a kumo hanyou to be more exact.

Despite the obvious age gap, the pair got along quite well and even their intellects matched enough for them to have deep intellectual conversations about pretty much everything. Some would find it odd that a teenager and a preteen were as close as they were, but to the two, it didn't really matter.

"Did something happen, Sesshoumaru?" Naraku asked, his demeanor changing from playful to somber in the blink of an eye.

Sesshoumaru looked away and nearly whispered, "I do not wish to speak of it."

When the young inu youkai broke eye contact with him, he knew that something was wrong. The dark-haired male frowned slightly, but he knew his friend well enough to know that he wouldn't tell him anything unless he wanted to. "Very well. I'm going to lay down. Care to join me?"

The silver-haired boy almost said no, but then he stopped himself. He realized that he did need some comfort and Naraku was pretty much the only one that ever offered it. The kumo had always offered him what his own parents would never give. It was sad in a way to know that.

Sesshoumaru nodded once and nearly yipped when he was grabbed by powerful arms. Naraku, with the boy in his arms, jumped up high and landed in the hanging hammock. Even though he had jumped high, he had them land ever so lightly as if they had fallen like feathers. Lying on his side, the kumo pulled the young youkai close to his body, his arms wrapped around the boy protectively.

Sesshoumaru snuggled closer to his friend and buried his face into Naraku's neck, just under his chin. His shorter, smaller arms were wrapped around his friend's body, as well. It was moments like these when he felt safe, content, and at peace. Whenever he felt like he was nothing, or when he was upset, he always had these arms around him.

One of Naraku's eyes peeked open and he smirked. With a lethargic yawn, he feigned stretching and then quickly rolled onto his back, taking the youkai with him. With a surprised "eeep!" Sesshoumaru found himself lying on top of the larger male. His golden eyes, wide with shock, stared into Naraku's smirking blood orbs.

"What's wrong, precious? You look surprised." The kumo asked innocently whereas the look on his face suggested otherwise.

While the inu thought up a witty reply to that, he couldn't help glaring at the flawless face of his handsome friend. He stared fixatedly at his older friend's chuckling lips and for whatever reason, he felt himself drawn to them.

An odd thought that had never ever come to his mind before struck him and without thinking, he asked, "Naraku...can I kiss you?"

Said kumo stopped laughing and it was his turn to stare with widened eyes. A sudden warmth that had more to do with the boy's words rather than the feeling of the boy's body filled his body pleasantly. He was speechless for a moment, but it didn't take him long to recover from such an unexpected request.

"Do you know what a kiss is, pet?" Naraku asked, one hand stroking the boy's back, the other caressing the side of his face.

The younger boy rolled his eyes and glared at the kumo. "Of course I know what a kiss is! I've seen other people kiss. Duh."

Naraku sighed. Truthfully, he was all for it, no questions asked. But his friend was rather young and he didn't want anything to get out of hand...yet. "You sure you want your first kiss from me?"

Sesshoumaru quickly sat up and glared down at him, one of his thin black eyebrows twitching in annoyance. He looked away, not wanting the other to see the rejected look on his face. "If you don't want to kiss me, that is fine. All you had to say was no. I understand, I'm not an idiot..."

Without another word, the kumo sat up, the inu falling into his lap. With the tips of his long fingers, he tilted the boy's face upwards. He stared down into those golden eyes and spoke in a low voice that sent shivers down the boy's spine, "I never said I didn't want to kiss you."

With no more words said, Naraku leaned down and brushed his lips lightly against Sesshoumaru's pink lips. Regardless of how slight the kiss was, it felt better than any other kiss the kumo had ever received. Daring to test the waters a bit, he applied some pressure to the kiss and was pleased when the boy eagerly responded to it. He felt those arms wrap around his neck and that body pressing closer to his own. The kumo pulled the inu even closer, if possible, and opened his mouth. The inu mirrored his actions by opening his mouth as well.

The smaller demon nearly purred with pleasure; kissing was so much better than he thought it would be. He felt the other demon's tongue enter his mouth to taste him and he decided that he liked that, too. He felt one hand cradling the back of his head while the other one ran up and down his back. The kiss deepened until he felt like he was being devoured and possessed at the same time.

Sesshoumaru tore his mouth away when he noticed that he was sitting on something hard that was poking him. He looked down and with his hand he poked it. His surprised eyes widened, but then they turned curious. "Naraku, what is this? Are you all right?"

"I...I'm fine." Naraku gasped out, his rose red eyes half-lidded. He nearly jumped when he felt his friend place his hand on his swollen sex.

"You sound like you are in pain." Sesshoumaru stated, staring up at his friend's flustered face.

"I assure you, I am not in any pain."

"Oh, ok. Why is this hard? Is this your penis?" Sesshoumaru asked casually, as if he were talking about a rock or a tree.

Naraku nearly fell out of the hammock. "Yes...and uh...I don't think you're old enough to know why it's doing that, yet..."

Sesshoumaru's face had a 'try me' look and without saying another word, he sat back on the kumo's lap and experimentally wiggled around. He smirked when he heard the kumo gasp and he didn't miss the aroused look on his friend's face. He continued to wiggle and bounce until large hands gripped his hips, halting all movement, but not moving him away from his crotch.

"You don't...know...what that is doing to me, Sesshoumaru."

The boy snorted. "That's because you won't tell me. Just tell me and I will stop, I promise."

Naraku bit back a moan when he felt the inu rub his pert little bottom against his achingly hard groin. He was so very tempted to just rip the boy's clothes off and take him. But he couldn't do that. This was his friend, not a whore. He was far too young and the kumo knew the boy wasn't ready for this, yet. But he would wait. He could, and would wait to claim this beautiful creature.

"To put this in simple terms, it gets hard when a male wants to mate. It only hurts if no release is obtained. Mating is when two beings physically come together to produce a child or just for the sheer pleasure of the mating act." The kumo explained and wanted to smack himself in the forehead. This was a talk the boy's father should have given him, but now was a better time than never.

"How does one mate?"

Naraku tired to move the boy off his lap, but he wouldn't budge. "It depends. This is something you'll find out later. I promise. You're too young for this."

The inu youkai pouted. "Who is going to mate with you?"

"No one. This is something I can take care of with my hand." As soon as those words left his mouth, he instantly regretted it.

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened. "Like this?"

"Sesshoumaru, don't-" Naraku started but stopped as soon as a small hand grabbed him.

"How do you make it go away?" The inu innocently asked, for he was intrigued and perplexed by this.

The kumo grabbed his hand and took it off his manhood. "Don't worry about it, kid. I can handle it," Naraku replied, and seeing the flash of anger in the inu's eyes at the 'kid' part, he finished, "I don't want you getting hurt. And you will get hurt if you don't stop touching me there."

"But I want to help. I'm not a kid. I can handle grown-up things, too." As if to accentuate his point, he slowly rolled his lower body against the kumo's. He heard the spider demon gasp and felt those large hands gripping his hips. He thought they were going to move him off, but he was mildly surprised when he felt them pressing him down on the spider's groin. He was even more pleased when the kumo leaned over and kissed him hard, almost to the point of bruising him. The inu felt the older man's hips rolling against him, that hardness rubbing insistently at his rear. Even though he was young and didn't understand completely, he decided he liked the foreign feeling.

Naraku groaned and kept up the rhythm until he was about to come, he was so close...and then he woke up. Disorientated, he sat up slightly and looked at his surroundings. He was still lying on the hammock with Sesshoumaru curled up against him. With a relieved sigh, he laid back and his confused eyes slid shut, but he did not fall back asleep. He couldn't sleep now that these whirling thoughts of his dream assaulted his mind. He was disappointed in a way that it hadn't of really happened, but he was relieved that it didn't happen because he never wanted to put his friend in such a position. Sesshoumaru was still a child, and was his friend, not some disposable bitch in heat. The boy was his only true friend and he intended to keep it that way.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A couple of hours later, the inu woke up and stretched his arms and legs. He smelled something familiar and pleasant and remembered where he was. He noticed that he was pretty much latched onto the side of Naraku and his face had been resting on said male's chest. He looked over and found that the kumo was watching silently him. The emotion in those wine red eyes was foreign to him.

"Have a good nap, pet?" The kumo asked while stroking the boy's beautiful silky silver hair.

Sesshoumaru merely nodded.

"Do you want to talk about what upset you?"

The inu shook his head, but after a few moments, he decided to talk about it anyway. "My mother left last night."

The spider demon rubbed the boy's back to comfort him and he nodded to show that he was listening and to encourage the child to expand.

"You know she has left before several times, but she's gone for good now. She wanted me to go with her. She wanted me choose between her and my father. Obviously, I didn't choose her." The inu explained in a monotonous voice as if he were talking about something boring like the weather. His young eyes betrayed how he really felt, though.

Naraku frowned, his crimson eyes displaying mixed emotions of anger, sympathy, and sadness. "You shouldn't have had to choose. Not something like that, precious."

"I know it sounds selfish, but I didn't want to leave. This is my home. I didn't want to leave father..." Sesshoumaru started, and finished in something barely than a whisper, "...and I didn't want to leave you."

Naraku stared at the inu for a few moments before a genuine smile spread on his lips. It was extremely rare for the Sesshoumaru to open up to anyone, even to his friend. He was just an exceptionally introverted person and opening up was considerably complicated and tough for him to do. But when he did open up, which was something he only did around the kumo, it was all the more touching.

"In that case, I'm glad you stayed, kiddo. I would have missed you, too." Naraku replied and then ruffled the younger boy's hair.

Sesshoumaru slapped the kumo's hand away, his face tinged with annoyance. "I'm not a kid..."

"If you say so."

Many minutes passed until the red, orange, and pink sky started to darken.

"I have to go home, now, Naraku. I should check on father."

"I understand. If you ever need anything, you know you're always welcome to come here, pet." The spider murmured, and then took up the boy into his arms and hopped down from the hammock.

With a chuckle, Naraku asked, "Does your father still hate me, Sesshoumaru?"

"More than Death itself. He would be furious if he knew that I'm still seeing you. I do not care if he does not like you. I like you. That is all that matters." Sesshoumaru stated while looking up at the much taller boy.

"You are a good friend, Sesshoumaru." Naraku smiled, looking down at the unbelievably beautiful boy.

"As are you." Sesshoumaru graced the other youkai with something just as rare as opening up: he smiled. And then he disappeared into the forest.

~*~*~*~*~*~

When Sesshoumaru entered the palace, the night was pitch black. He sniffed the air, caught his father's scent, and followed it until he found his father's room. As silently as he could, he slid the shoji door open and slipped inside the darkened room.

His father was sleeping on his side, with his back to the door. He was sleeping in the spot that his mate used to sleep.

The younger inu youkai watched for a few moments, then he turned to leave, but he was stopped by his father's voice.

"Sesshoumaru. Come here." Commanded Inu no Taishou, his powerful baritone rolling off the walls.

Without hesitation, the boy did as he was told and approached his father. He stopped when he was a mere couple of feet away.

"Come to where I can see you, pup."

Sesshoumaru, without comment, walked around his father and stood to where he could be visibly seen. He almost gasped at his father's exhausted, distressed appearance. His face appeared haggard and there were dark bags under his eyes. Obviously he hadn't had a lick of sleep since his mate had left him, no, them.

The inu pup stood there awkwardly, waiting for further instruction until his father beckoned him to come closer with a gesture of one of his strong arms. With slight hesitation this time, he edged and then fell down to his knees on the bed and crawled over to the taiyoukai. He nearly yipped when a powerful arm shot out and grabbed him, then yanked him against a body that was harder and larger than Naraku's. With his back pressed against that body, two arms wrapped around him, holding him close.

Touga's eyelids slid shut as he nuzzled his pup's slender neck. His tense body relaxed and even his hold on his pup lessened. Normally, the taiyouki would have detected the scent that clung to the boy's body, but he was too tired and distraught to notice.

The young dog demon relaxed as well and felt that his father did care and love him. He was glad that his father was bothered by the absence of his mate, his child's mother, too. Up until this moment he felt like he had been the only one grieving.

It was this night, and many more to come that they both would find solace in each other when the night was as dark as their hearts, and the house as silent as their sorrow.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Weeks passed into months and things gradually got better. Everyone in the taiyoukai's castle eventually adapted to the permanent absence of the Lady. Peace returned and things were almost as they used to be, except to some, the presence of the Lady still lurked in the palace like a lingering memory. None felt said presence stronger than Inu no Taishou and Sesshoumaru. But even so, life went on and as time passed, it got better to bear.

Touga ruled his lands as he always did and when he wasn't busy doing just that, he would spend his time with his son. Whether it be Sesshoumaru's training, checking up on his studies, or just for his company, Touga was very involved with his son and neither of them minded it one bit. In some ways, because of the pup's mother left, the two were much closer than before.

Sesshoumaru, always wanting to make his father proud, trained as hard as he could. He opened his mind to his studies, learning all that he could. His trainers and tutors were very impressed by his attitude and his skills. His mother had begun to drift into the back of his mind because he chose to focus on the present and on the future. It helped immensely that his bond with his father had strengthened significantly.

And when he wasn't with his father, tutors, or trainers, he was with his friend Naraku.

~*~*~*~*~*~

As many years came to pass, Sesshoumaru grew taller and bigger. His strength and intelligence only multiplied over the years, as well. His physical traits didn't change all that much except for enlarging and lengthening. His hair was as long as his father's and his facial markings, the stripes and crescent moon, all got as dark as Inu no Taishou's similar markings. It would seem that the darkening of the markings marked the beginning of his maturity. It was a bit like puberty, actually. Everything felt different now and in his demon adolescence he started looking at everything and everyone differently.

He even started figuring out what he wanted in life. One of the things he had always wanted to do was travel across all the lands. He had decided that someday when he was both strong and old enough, he would do just that. Even though he wasn't the most social person, he did want to see how the world was. The inu also wanted to follow in his father's footsteps and become the strongest. He wanted to be just like his father.

The kumo, on the other hand, had grown noticeably as well. He was completely matured and was considered an adult demon, even for a hanyou such as himself. Hanyous took almost as long as youkai to mature since the demon blood was obviously dominant over the human blood.

Naraku was close to seven feet tall, in fact, he was about 6'10" to be precise. He was taller than both dog demons. Touga's height was about 6'4" and Sesshoumaru's at about 6'1".

Sesshoumaru would probably not pass over 6'1", but if he happened to, he still wouldn't surpass his friend's great towering height. Not that he minded, though. His friend being taller than him didn't bother him anymore. It would seem to the younger inu that he would always have to look up to the kumo. In fact, it was rather comforting in a way, although he wasn't exactly sure why.

Besides the kumo's impressive height, he didn't physically change all that much. He did gain many more muscles and even toned them, too. His sculpted figure was more powerfully built, yet he didn't look like a muscle-bound Conan. And with his age, his eyes were more narrowed, but they were still as breathtaking just like the rest of him was. In fact, any female demon that laid eyes on him was so impressed she would be tempted to mate with him on the spot.

But Naraku did not waste his time with any woman or with any demoness.

Physically and mentally, the kumo was many things, most of which betrayed his masculine, demonic maturity. He wasn't a teenager anymore. He was an adult and thought like one and had desire like one.

He was...Powerful. Reserved. Self-Controlled. And more.

Like the devil, most did not know of him. But he existed. Those that knew of him, like Inu no Taishou, were very wary of him for various reasons.

Despite being longtime friends with the inu, he had barely told Sesshoumaru anything about his own past. Or even who his parents were. He liked that the younger male had never pried, and for the same reason, he had never pried into Sesshoumaru. It was out of sole respect and privacy.

Or perhaps it was something else altogether?

~*~*~*~*~*~

It was very early in the morning when Sesshoumaru had decided to leave the castle, by himself, of course. He headed deep into the forest and wandered the many miles that it took to find Naraku's home. Astonishingly enough, Naraku had the ability to make his scent disappear entirely. He also could leave a scent trail specifically for one or more people. He usually only left a scent trail for Sesshoumaru, though.

Said dog demon arrived at the home of Naraku, yet the hanyou was nowhere to be seen. He sniffed the air until he caught a whiff of the kumo's scent. With a slight smirk, he followed it until he reached the hot springs. It didn't take him long to see the naked kumo standing in the water with his back pressed up against the rock. His lengthy hair was unbound, floating in the water and the water reached up to his nipples. His eyes were closed and he appeared to be unaware that the inu was even there.

Sesshoumaru just stood there silently and stared, barely breathing at all. He felt a strange heat in the pit of his stomach, yet he couldn't place it. All sorts of foreign thoughts started racing through his mind, which made him all the more confused and befuddled. Had Naraku always been this beautiful?

"Are you going to stand there gaping at me all day or are you going to join me, precious?" Naraku purred, yet his eyes still remained shut.

Sesshoumaru shook his unusual thoughts away and pondered the kumo's question for a moment. If he recalled correctly, he hadn't bathed with the other man since he was a preteen. He considered getting into the water even though some part of his brain told him that would be a bad idea. He couldn't figure out why it would be a good idea, so he decided to ignore it in favor of his desire to get clean.

"As you wish." The inu murmured and turned around. He placed his sword propped up against a rock and carefully started to divest himself of his clothing.

That was the exact moment the spider decided to open his eyes. Instead of looking away, like most people would have politely done, he decided to watch the strip show. A burning heat pooled in his groin while he watched the inu remove his clothes and place it on the rock next to the sword. The sight of that perfectly sculpted body, that perfect round, tight ass, that smooth, pale skin, and those long legs made the spider demon painfully erect. He thanked the gods that the water was there to hide it.

Sesshoumaru then chose to turn around, which gave the kumo a good look at his front view. It was tantalizing as well and he was pleased to know the inu was well-endowed. Of course, that didn't really matter to him, though.

Before the youkai noticed that he was openly staring at him, Naraku closed his eyes and feigned disinterest.

The silver-haired male stepped into the pleasant water and wadded through the water until he reached his friend. He chose to stand right next to him and he, too, slid his eyes shut.

"You seemed bothered, Naraku. Anything wrong?"

The kumo chuckled. "Not at all. In fact, I feel...much better now that you are here in my presence."

If Sesshoumaru had been familiar with flirting at all, he would have known that the spider demon was shamelessly flirting with him. "Well, I am glad that you feel better."

"If I hurt myself, would you kiss my booboo?"

The inu's eyes slid open and he turned his head to stare with bemused eyes at his friend. To his surprise, those red eyes were already staring at him with mirth. "What are you playing at?"

The kumo chuckled and stretched his arms over his head and feigned a bored yawn. "I'm not playing at anything. Although...there is something I would like to play with."

"How old are you again? I know you're older than me."

"Oh, come now, Sesshoumaru. There are games that adults can play too. There are also...adult toys."

Sesshoumaru's eyebrows furrowed in further bewilderment. "I don't understand. What kind of games can adults play?"

Naraku moved closer until he was almost touching the inu. He leaned in close to the younger man's pointed ear and whispered lowly, "Ones that involve sex."

"Sex?" Sesshoumaru echoed as a shiver wracked his body.

"You know, that thing two people or animals do ...it's called mating."

"Oh. Well, I have never done that."

Naraku snickered. "Obviously."

The gorgeous inu shoved the kumo away from him playfully, but then he sobered up and inquired, "have you ever...?"

The dark-haired male tilted his head to the side and tapped his chin with his index finger. "A few times."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and he asked curiously, "Really? When?"

"Oh, that was a long time ago. Before I even knew you. I haven't paired with another since I met you."

"Hm, I see." Sesshoumaru bit his bottom lip, deeply in thought. It was a trait that Naraku had always thought was cute. "Um...do you know if you have any children?"

The kumo laughed hard and clutched his sides. Tears came to his side. When he calmed down, he looked at his friend and smiled cheekily, "I don't believe so. If any of them had children from the coupling, then Kami certainly has a sense of humor."

"I do not follow," Sesshoumaru replied, his voice and visage clearly baffled.

"They were all males, Sesshoumaru. I have never copulated with a female and before you ask, I never intend to. Why? Because I'm not attracted to them. Why? I don't know. I just know what I like."

The younger demon was shocked at this and didn't know what to say so that he chewed at his lip again as he absorbed the information that he had just learned.

"Does that bother you, pet?"

Sesshoumaru looked at him, his golden eyes as clear and astute as ever. "No."

"So I'm still you're friend, then?"

The inu rolled his eyes at this and responded with, "of course you are, baka."

They sat in silence for a few long minutes before Sesshoumaru decided that he had enough of the warm water. It felt lukewarm to him now, which meant his body had adjusted completely to the water. Without a word, he stepped out of the water and laid down on a flat rock to dry off. Even though it was in the morning, the air was still quit warm and he anticipated it wouldn't take longer than five to ten minutes to dry off. He closed his eyes.

The inu turned his head to the side and noticed that the kumo was watching him, the depths of his wine colored eyes unreadable. He looked away just as soon as he had glanced. Sometimes when he caught Naraku staring, the look in his eyes reminded him of how his parents had often stared at each other. He wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing. He decided to ignore it. His golden eyes slid shut and he reveled in the silence. One of the perks about their relationship was that they both didn't mind the silence. They didn't have to constantly blabber about worthless things. Instead, they could enjoy the silence, and talk when they felt the need to.

Before Sesshoumaru knew it, he was dry. His hair was still damp, but that wasn't a problem. He was dressed in no time despite all the layers of clothes he had to wear and fold. He often wished he could wear more simpler kimono's like Naraku's. But he was the son of the lord, so he had to dress like one.

"I'm going to take a walk. I'll be back soon." Sesshoumaru stated blandly and strode away, his steps silent and graceful. He was gone before the kumo could utter a reply.

~*~*~*~*~*~

In barely less than a minute of walking, the inu was interrupted by someone. A demoness stood in his way. She was dressed in a kimono that a human would wear in a pleasure house. Her black hair was unbound and spilling over her shoulders and down her back. Pale blue eyes stared hungrily at the young demon male and a single fang poked out from her lips.

"Why, hello, handsome..." She purred, her eyes and body mimicking that of a predator.

A think black eyebrow lifted and he merely stared at her. He hoped that she got out of his way or he was going to have to resort to violence.

"Don't speak much, then? That's all right. What I plan to do with you won't require much speaking, if any, at all."

The dog demon just stared at her and wondered what her problem was. But then he smelled it. Her scent was odd. It wasn't the normal scent that most female demons carried; it was tinged with another smell. He wracked his brain and then he remembered that he had scented that smell on his mother and a few other females before.

This bitch was in heat.

If he remembered correctly, the smell had driven most of the males crazy, including his father. His mother had to be pretty much imprisoned in a room. Of course, his father usually was inside said room with her doing whatever they usually did. If Touga wasn't in the room, he was always outside the room, guarding it. Besides his father, only Sesshoumaru had been allowed to go near his mother whenever she was in heat. The reason being because he was her child and was unaffected by her condition.

The inu inhaled the scent, but it didn't make him feel anything. He was as unaffected now as he was back then. He decided he would ask the kumo about that later.

"Get out of my way, now, woman, or I will have to remove you."

"I'm not going anywhere until after I'm done mating with you. Whether you want it or not, I will have you." The demoness growled, her eyes bleeding red.

Before either demon could do or say anything, powerful arms grabbed the inu from behind and spun him around.

It was Naraku and he was still wet and very, very naked.

"I'm afraid I cannot let you do that, little demoness." Naraku stated as if it were an obvious fact to the whole world.

She hissed, "why?"

Naraku smirked. "Because this one is mine."

Before either the demoness or Sesshoumaru could speak, he pulled the inu flush up against his nude body. He leaned over and sealed his lips to Sesshoumaru's and poured every bit of passion that was pent up inside of him into the kiss. And so that there were no other doubts, he snaked one of his hands down and groped the inu's luscious ass.

Her eyes widened and her jaw hung open. She had heard of male pairings before, and it wasn't taboo in the demon world, but the fact that she was being rejected for another male was a blow to her female pride. With an infuriated snarl, she stamped her little foot and then stalked away to find some other poor male to take advantage of.

When the kumo decided that they both desperately needed air, he released the inu's lips, but didn't let the younger demon out of his grasp. He also reluctantly stopped groping that fabulous ass, too. With an obvious, typical Naraku smirk, he snickered, "I can't let you out of my sight for even one minute without your sexy ass getting in trouble."

Sesshoumaru just stared up at him, his face blatantly revealing his complete shock. blatant. He didn't even notice that his body was trembling, but he felt the heat that shot through him along with the myriads of confusing feelings. He looked away and stared at anything but the kumo.

Naraku, being the keen person that he was, didn't fail to notice. He gently grabbed the inu's chin and tilted it up so his ruby eyes met those lovely golden orbs. "Something is wrong. Normally, I would wait, but I insist that you tell me now. Did me kissing you bother you?"

Sesshoumaru stared back for a few moments before he answered in a quiet voice, "Yes...and no."

"Please expand on that, pet."

"I am confused," was all that the inu said.

"About what? You can tell me."

"That...that demoness. She was in heat, I smelled it, but it didn't affect me. Father told me that all demon males are affected by the scent of a female in heat. He said it drives them mad. She didn't make me feel anything at all. Just irritation." Sesshoumaru explained, a little blush tinting his smooth porcelain skin.

"Well, maybe you're just a late bloomer. I wouldn't be too worried about it at the moment. Everyone is ready at a different time." Naraku explained and then freed the inu from his hold. He started to walk back to the springs. "I'm going to get dressed..."

Sesshoumaru licked his lips and without thinking, he called out, "but I felt something when you kissed and touched me."

Naraku halted all movement and looked over his shoulder at the youkai, his smoldering blood orbs once more unreadable. "I see," he paused, then continued, "I think you should go home for now, precious. Think about what you felt, then come back when you're ready to talk about it, ok?"

Sesshoumaru stared at him for a moment and with a small nod, he turned away and walked away.

"Oh, and Sesshoumaru? Try not to get raped!" Naraku called after him, a jeer in his voice.

The inu merely rolled his eyes and eventually he disappeared from sight.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A week passed, and Sesshoumaru had still not returned to the forest to see his friend.

He had thought about what he had felt day and night for an entire week. He was still very conflicted and confused. He talked even less than normal, ate less, slept less, and couldn't concentrate. Even his own father had noticed that something wasn't right with him and had asked numerous times what was wrong. Sesshoumaru had told him each time that he was just feeling a bit under the weather and needed more rest. After all, it wasn't abnormal for the younger inu to be very quiet.

The young inu had never had much contact with others his whole life. Most demons that he met he had always felt were untrustworthy, and others weren't mature enough for his liking. He had been lonely for most of his life...until he met Naraku. After he had met the spider, he was never lonely and always had someone to run to for comfort and fun. He never needed anyone else.

In truth, he was confused with how his body had reacted to Naraku and how it had not reacted to the female demon. He had always been around the kumo, naked or clothed, and had touched and been touched by him...yet he had never felt those baffling, stimulating feelings before.

Until now.

Now he wasn't so sure. All he knew was that he had liked the kiss and the feel of his friend's body against his. And even though he wasn't one to feel fear, he was indeed afraid. Afraid that what he already had with Naraku would change. He liked the way things were and never wanted it to change. He definitely was a stubborn youkai.

Sesshoumaru wanted to go see the kumo, but he couldn't bring himself to leave the castle. Instead, he stayed in his room most of the time, either pacing the room or lying on his futon. He was uncertain, and when he was uncertain, he didn't like to pursue anything. He liked to be certain, which is why he analyzed pretty much everything to death. Part of him screamed for him to go to Naraku, the other part of him said Hell no!

After many hours of tiresome deliberation with himself, he finally fell into an uneasy slumber.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Sesshoumaru's eyes flew open when he felt another presence in his room. Surprisingly, he hadn't heard anyone come in. He sat up quickly and looked in the direction of the intruder to find that it was his inky black-haired friend.

He opened his mouth to speak, but before he knew it, his friend's large hand was clamped over his mouth and. Not only that, but the kumo was sitting in his lap and even had the nerve to move around to make himself more comfortable.

"Sssh, you must be quiet. Your father is patrolling the hallways. He passes by your room every so often. We wouldn't want him to come in here now, would we?" Naraku whispered into the inu's pointy ear, his hot breath tickled him and gave him goose bumps.

Sesshoumaru merely stared at him, one eyebrow lifted.

"I'm going to remove my hand. Can you be quiet?"

After he received a curt not, he removed his hand, but he didn't removed himself from the inu's person.

"Why are you here, Naraku? My father will kill you if he finds out you are here."

Said kumo chuckled for a moment, but then he sobered up. "Why have you not come? I told you to come back to me."

"I do not know," was all Sesshoumaru said.

Naraku stared into his friend's eyes for a few minutes until he saw what he was looking for. "You are still confused, yes?"

"Hai."

The spider demon gingerly stood up and sat himself next to his puzzled friend. "I have my suspicions, but I will not voice them until I am sure. Now, I want you to picture me naked. Close your eyes. Don't be afraid. Just picture it. Can you do that, pet?"

Sesshoumaru nodded, then he laid back. His beautiful eyes slid shut and he recalled the sight of his friend buck naked. Everything about Naraku was larger than him and even though that fact would discourage most males, it did nothing but excite the inu. His skin was darker than Sesshoumaru's, but it was smooth, hairless, and unblemished. There were no scars, well, except for the large scar of a spider that covered his back. Somehow that only added more to the exotic appeal of the kumo. Naraku's body, including his taut ass, was chiseled and toned, yet he wasn't overly muscled. Now, Sesshoumaru hadn't seen a lot of cocks since he was born, but he could definitely tell that Naraku's manhood was big. Hell, it was even larger than his own father's. All in all, the spider demon was impressive physically. There were no doubts about his masculinity.

A low, seductive voice whispered, "Do you see it?"

Sesshoumaru merely nodded, his eyes still closed.

"How does it look to you?"

"Strong. Sleek. Powerful. Big. Beautiful..." Sesshoumaru murmured; his body felt tight and hot. It was like he had a fever, but it felt good, in a way.

"How does it make you feel?"

"Hot. Tight. Feverish. It makes me want something I have no name for. It makes me want..."

"Open your eyes now, precious."

Sesshoumaru's eyelids fluttered open and he almost melted on the spot when he saw that gorgeous face smiling at him. "So...what do you think?"

"What you told me and the fact that you are aroused tells me that you prefer the company of males. If I had known you enjoyed my company that much, I would have gotten naked more often."

Sesshoumaru snorted and punched his friend in the arm. "Be serious."

"How serious do you want me to be?" Naraku purred.

The dog demon swiftly sat up, his golden eyes never leaving his friend. He crawled into the kumo's lap, and effectively straddled him. "Kiss me."

Naraku stared into those lovely eyes for a moment, then he leaned over, his lips almost touching the inu's. It pleased him immensely to feel the inu's erection pressed against his washboard stomach. One hand pulled the younger male closer to him, the other slid into his hair, cradling the back of his head. Without another word, he pressed his lips against Sesshoumaru's, slowly at first, as if this were their first kiss. He felt those lips respond to his own, which made him deepen the kiss. He plunged his tongue inside the inu's mouth and tasted his honey sweetness.

It felt close to what he'd call heaven, but Naraku knew he had to end it quickly.

Naraku pulled away from the kiss and hugged the younger male close to his body. he rested his chin lightly on top of the inu's head and he sighed deeply. There was regret embedded in his voice as he murmured quietly, "Remember when you asked me why I came here, Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru nodded, half of his face buried in the kumo's chest. He felt like a small child again because of the way his friend held him. It was the way his parents used to hold him a long time ago. It was comforting to be held that way and it even helped to quell the strange desire he felt.

"I was going to wait for you to come to me...but I couldn't wait because something came up. I didn't want you to seek me out and think I've abandoned you when you couldn't find me." The kumo explained, his voice as serious as murder.

The inu jerked up and nearly slammed his head into the kumo's chin, yet fortunately, the spider moved his head back to avoid the collision. "What? What do you mean?"

The kumo chuckled, but sobered up quickly enough to offer the inu a much deserved explanation. "Something came up of grave importance. I will be gone for an undetermined amount of time. It may be weeks, months..."

"Will you be in danger?" The inu carefully asked, for he didn't want to try and push anything out of the kumo even though he was alarmed.

"There is always danger. But I promise, I will come back. I hate having to do this, but this is something you would do if it came to that."

Sesshoumaru nodded slowly and he stood up sluggishly, clearly in a daze. The information still hadn't sunk into him completely, but the idea that his friend was going to be gone for awhile was quite distressing. He never took separation very well.

Naraku stood up and grabbed the shorter demon by the face and looked deeply into his eyes. "I am not forsaking you. I will return. My mother has gone missing and I must find her. You have my word...I will be back for you. Will you promise me one thing?"

The silver-haired beauty nodded and he felt drunk by looking into those crimson eyes.

"Be strong, Sesshoumaru. You have strength that even you do not know of. There is no shame in wanting comfort. It doesn't make you weak. Remember that." Naraku uttered right before he kissed the other male as if it were the last time they would ever kiss. He then turned away, but before he left, he looked at Sesshoumaru one last time.

And then he was gone.

The inu youkai slid down to his knees on the futon and sighed. Naraku had promised him that he would be back, but that kiss, despite it being deliciously good, told him otherwise.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Days passed, weeks passed by ever so dreadfully slowly and still no sign of Naraku.

Unfortunately, Touga was almost always out of the castle doing whatever it was that he did. Sesshoumaru always assumed that he was out patrolling the lands or meeting with other demon lords. Or fighting. Inu no Taishou did sometimes come home with blood on his armor or with healing wounds. Sometimes he came home troubled and annoyed. In a way, his father was just like him. He hated how stupid and petty people were and so did his father. But as a lord, it was his job and he had to socialize sometimes.

Sesshoumaru was definitely not looking forward to that. He knew that someday he would have to. But for now, he had some freedom.

Fortunately, he had learned all that he could from his tutors and his fighting skills were extraordinary, just like his father's. He still trained daily, though.

He had already noticed subtle changes in his father's demeanor and attitude as of late. His father seemed more stressed out and it was evident that he barely got sleep. Inu no Taishou spoke even less than he usually did and when he ate, it was meager.

Sesshoumaru had offered to help with whatever it was that bothered his father, but Touga had refused and told him not to worry about it.

Easier said than done.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A month later, Sesshoumaru stood in the courtyard watching the ravens peck at the food that the servants had tossed out. It was a cold and cloudy day and it did nothing to improve his foul, bored mood. His father had been gone for a few days, as usual, and as usual, the younger inu was left in the dark.

"Sesshoumaru," called a familiar, deep booming voice.

The dog demon turned and saw his father's imposing form striding hastily towards him. His handsome face was quite solemn and he looked as if he were going to have a grim talk with his son or he were going to war.

"Yes, my lord father?"

"We will have words. Follow me." Touga commanded and without waiting for a reply, he walked away just as quickly as he had come.

Without a word, Sesshoumaru followed behind him obediently, his curiosity piqued.

As soon as they were in Touga's study, he slid the shoji door shut and faced his son. When he was sure he had his son's undivided attention, he stated, "I am sure that you have been wondering what your father has been doing for quite some time."

Sesshoumaru merely nodded.

"Youkai in this land and from neighboring lands are becoming more unstable. I have been dealing with them, keeping them off the border and punishing those in the land that have defied the laws. The dragon demon Ryukotsusei is becoming a big problem fast, as well. He seeks to destroy me and to take you as his mate. I know I have kept this from you, but since you have matured, he has been asking to mate with you. I have denied him that and he is angry.

Another matter I wish to discuss with you is one of the females I have used is pregnant with my child. Her name is Izayoi, and she is human. It was against my better judgment, I admit, but what's done is done. She means nothing to me, but the child does. As soon as she bears it, the child will come to the castle. He or she will be your sibling and I expect you to treat him or her as such. Am I understood?" Touga explained curtly. It was obvious he wasn't going to expand on anything.

"Hai, my lord father," was all the younger inu said. He was too stunned to say much else, and even if he weren't, he knew better than to question his father.

Sesshoumaru stared at the wall, his eyes unfocused as he took in the information. Someone wanted to mate him, and he was going to have a sister or a brother? It seemed too ridiculous to be true, but his father was not a liar.

His father had never thought to bring any of this up before? He had never mentioned the dragon demon before. Sure, on one of the meetings where Touga had brought Sesshoumaru along, the younger inu vaguely remembered meeting a demon by the name of Ryukotsusei. During the whole meeting, he had felt the dragon watching him, but he had dismissed it as mere intimidation. It bugged him that his father didn't even let him know about this. It would have been nice just to know. It was his decision, after all. He probably wouldn't have consented to mating with the dragon demon, but still, actually being able to decline the offer himself would have been nice.

And...why had his father impregnated some foolish mortal? He always thought his father to be a careful, wise man. Even if his father slaked his lust wherever he chose, surely he would have been much more cautious. He always calculated everything and never did anything on impulse. His father was so much like him in many ways, which is why it was hard to understand the things his father did that was unlike him.

But then it hit Sesshoumaru. Maybe his father sought to replace him with another heir. His father had never bothered to get his mother or any other female pregnant after he was born. And now, all of a sudden, he was being replaced by some unborn half-breed. Was he not good enough? Obviously not, it seemed.

If the young inu had been looking, he would have noticed the soft look that crossed his father's visage. He would have noticed the adoration and love in those eyes that were so much like his own. But he didn't; he didn't look at his father until the older demon had left.

If he had noticed, then maybe, maybe he wouldn't have headed down such a destructive path.

But it was too late. Sesshoumaru was already falling apart at the seams.

He was falling.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Months dragged on by and Touga was unsurprisingly absent most of the time. And when he was around, he barely said one word to his son.

Sesshoumaru's behavior drastically changed as well. He hardly ate anymore and his sleep was usually disturbed by unknown nightmares that he couldn't remember when he woke up. He also found himself wandering throughout the forest out of boredom and when some demon got in his way, he swiftly killed him or her. His disposition was much colder and his pity waned. He even started speaking in the third person. It seemed less personal to speak in that manner.

Most days, he didn't even bother going back home. He would find himself inside the Hollow tree. Naraku's scent still lingered in the air, but was more potent on the hammock and futon. He found it easier to sleep when the kumo's scent was around him.

Naraku said he would return, but Sesshoumaru started to seriously doubt that. Perhaps like his mother and now his father, Naraku wasn't the person he thought he was.

His mother was gone, Naraku was gone, and now his father would be gone.

Everyone always left him in the end.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Time had passed and if Sesshoumaru was correct, the human woman, Izayoi, would be bearing that bastard hanyou any day now. His father hadn't been at the palace in over a month now and he was tired of it.

He decided it was time to confront his father. Even if his father killed him, he would get his answers.

So, he put on his armor and tied his sword to his sash. He left the castle and followed his father's scent. It was faint and very old, but he was sure he could find him. It took him a week to finally track the old dog down, and when he did, he couldn't believe what he saw.

His father stood, his back to him. Blood soaked his clothes and parts of his armor was fractured. His sword was still drawn and bloody. Obviously, from the looks of it, he had just come from a rather intense battle.

The smell of Inu no Taishou's blood was very pungent, which meant he was bleeding a lot.

"Father."

"Ryukotsusei is dead...now. But your unborn brother is in danger. I will save him."

" Father, why do you insist on going? You are mortally injured."

" Do you intend to stop me, Sesshomaru?"

Sesshoumaru paused for a long moment before replying, "No, I do not intend to stand in your way." The younger inu had so many questions screaming in his mind, but he couldn't bring himself to voice them.

"I see. Goodbye Sesshoumaru."

Before the older dog could move, Sesshoumaru bitterly blurted out with, "Why? You are going to die if you go. Why kill yourself for some bastard child? You should go back to the castle and allow your wounds to heal, father."

"Have you someone to protect, Sesshoumaru?" Touga asked, ignoring his son's questions. It seemed his mind was made up already and he wouldn't change it for the world.

"Someone to protect?" Sesshoumaru repeated, and even as he thought on it, the image of Naraku came to mind, but he shoved that thought away. "No. I have no one to protect."

Inu no Taishou sighed. "I pray that someday you will. Then you will understand why I have done what I have done. Farewell, my son."

And with those last cryptic words, Touga lunged away, disappearing into the night like a phantom.

That was the last time Sesshoumaru saw his father.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Sesshoumaru learned the following morning from the flea Myouga that his father had died and that Izayoi had survived the attack. Her infant, whom Touga had named InuYasha, had also survived. Touga had also left behind a sword called Tensaiga for his eldest son. Myouga had left it for him and scattered when he saw the demon's glare.

Despite his curiously, Sesshoumaru had no real desire to see his hanyou brother. He didn't have any desire to do anything.

Except for one thing.

Sesshoumaru stood in his father's bedroom. His face was blank, devoid of all emotions even though on the inside the pain was excruciating. He wanted to end the pain. He was tired of being alone. He was tired of living a meaningless life. He was tired of everyone leaving him. Everyone that he cared about always went away in the end.

He was very calm when he unsheathed his sword. Most always assumed that when people committed suicide that they were a nervous, unstable wreck. In reality, they are quite placid before and during their suicide because they know that everything would finally end.

It was time to go.

Sesshoumaru raised the sword high in the air, paused to position it, then he swiftly plunged the blade into his breast, though his heart, and out his back. Without even wincing, he sliced the blade down to his navel. Then he stopped and ripped the sword out. With trembling hands, the bloody sword dropped from his hand and clattered to the ground.

The inu youkai fell down to his knees, his eyes wide at first. His eyelids slowly slid shut as the blood critically poured from his mortal wounds. As the blood left his body, he felt his life slipping away. The strength ebbed away and he didn't, couldn't stop himself from falling down face first on his parent's bed.

In a way, it was very fitting that he should die on the bed he was conceived and born on.

That was his last conscious thought.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Sesshoumaru's eyelids slowly fluttered open like a dying butterfly's wings. Even though it was dark, he saw a haze of different colors mashed together. And the air smelled very familiar. In fact, familiar arms cradled him close to a familiar body.

Naraku...

"Sesshoumaru?"

Said inu looked up slowly and saw Naraku staring down at him, concern evident on his handsome features. He felt like he was in a dream. "Is this the afterlife?"

"Thank kami you're alive." The kumo whispered, and pulled the younger male closer. "I thought I had lost you."

It dawned on Sesshoumaru that this was no dream. "This Sesshoumaru...is alive..."

"Did you...did you try to kill yourself, Sesshoumaru?" Naraku asked quite hesitantly. He wanted to assume that someone else had tried to kill the beautiful demon.

Sesshoumaru looked away, and said nothing. He didn't have to. The answer was as clear as a cloudless sky.

"My kami, why?"

"This Sesshoumaru does not have to answer to the likes of you."

"Why are you talking like that?"

"This is none of your business, hanyou. Now kindly remove your person from this Sesshoumaru." The inu coldly spat, his eyes just as detached as his voice.

Naraku's eyes narrowed. He smacked Sesshoumaru hard across the face, but he did not release him.

The dog's eyes widened considerably; he sat up and grabbed fistfuls of the kumo's kimono in his hands. Tears sprang in his eyes and he buried his face in the older demon's chest and sobbed hard and long.

For the first time in two hundred years, Sesshoumaru cried.

Naraku stroked his back and rocked him back and forth. "It's all right. I'm here now. Let it all out..."

For what seemed like hours to the inu, but merely ten minutes, he wept. His sobs died down until he only hiccupped and sniffled every so often. The hand that was stroking his back moved to run its long tapered fingers through his long silver silken locks. That relaxed the inu to the point that he was nearly dozing off.

"Sesshoumaru? What happened?" Naraku asked gently, concern etched into his face and his voice.

For several long minutes Sesshoumaru didn't answer. He just stared at the kumo's chest, his golden eyes unfocused as he pondered Naraku's inquiry.

"I didn't want to live anymore. Mother left, you left, and father left. You all left me in some way. You all chose to leave me. Father is dead...he died for some bastard child. He would not live for me. Once I thought he cared...but he never did. He never loved me. I was never good enough for him. I was never good enough for anyone. I wanted to die...because I was tired of the pain...I was tired of being alone."

Naraku sighed and nuzzled the younger male's slender, yet strong neck. "For what it's worth, I am sorry I wasn't here. I don't know if your mother ever cared about you, but I know that Inu no Taishou loved you. I know because he told me. Before I left to find my mother, I confronted him. He told me that everything he was doing was for you. He had been dying for years, Sesshoumaru. That sword of his, So'unga, had taken its toll on him. He got rid of that sword because he didn't want you to suffer his fate. He was already dying, Sesshoumaru. I think that's why he didn't want to remain in this world. He didn't want you to watch him die. He knew it would kill you to see him that way.

He also told me he wanted to leave some family behind for you. So he had decided to give you a brother or a sister. He told me that he got some human pregnant because if she had been a demon, she would have tried to use her son to steal the lands from you. If you think he was trying to replace you, you couldn't be more wrong. He even protected you from many demons that wanted to use you, like Ryukotsusei, for example."

Sesshoumaru stared at Naraku, not sure whether to believe him or not. He felt numb.

"He loved you more than anyone else. More than his own mate. It doesn't seem that way, but nothing is ever as it seems. He told me to tell you all this after he was dead. Everything that he did...was for you, Sesshoumaru."

The inu youkai looked at the kumo, and suddenly, he believed him. Why, he didn't know. But at that moment, it was all clear to him. He nodded.

"How am I still alive?"

"You were dead, I believe. Your father's sword told me that it could resurrect you, so I did just that. I saw these strange little imps trying to steal you away. I cut them away. I wasn't sure if it had worked or not until a few minutes later when you opened your eyes."

Sesshoumaru looked until his eyes landed on said sword that had brought him back to this world. "I see."

"I want you to know that...I have always cared for you, Sesshoumaru. I would never abandon you. I came back, didn't I? Since the first day I laid eyes on you, I wanted you for my own. I never mated with anyone else after I met you. No one else was good enough and I could only think of you.

As the years passed, my longing for you grew and grew. I enjoyed being your friend, but I always wanted to be your mate. I never wanted to force you, though, so I waited patiently. And even if you never return my feelings for you, I will always be your friend. I love you, Sesshoumaru, and I always will." Naraku exposed, his voice brimming with raw emotion. There were no lies in his words nor his eyes.

Sesshoumaru looked at him, his amber eyes wide with shock. He was utterly speechless and overwhelmed.

The kumo smiled at him. "You do not know how overjoyed I am that you're alive. I don't know what I would have done..." Naraku shook those thoughts away and continued, "It's been a rough night for you, precious. I'll bet your tired. Some sleep would do you a world of good."

The inu nodded gratefully and almost yipped when the kumo stood up, holding him in his arms like a bride. He carried the inu to his bed and laid him down gently. He tried to stand up, but the dog's arms were still latched to his body. "Sesshoumaru..."

"Lie with me until I fall asleep?" Sesshoumaru whispered, sounding very much like a child afraid of the dark.

Naraku smiled and nodded. He laid down and pulled the inu into his arms.

It almost felt like old times. Except now they both knew that there was more to the embrace, to the love than just mere friendship.

~*~*~*~*~*~

It wasn't until late afternoon that Sesshoumaru woke up. He had slept for a good fifteen hours or so. He still felt worn out and depressed, though. In spite of everything that he had been told, he still felt like crying. His father was still dead.

But most of all, he felt stupid, weak, and guilty. He had promised Naraku he would be strong, but he couldn't even do that. He had selfishly tried to end his life forever because of some misunderstandings. He had assumed that no one had cared. He knew now that he was wrong.

So very wrong.

Sesshoumaru sat up and groggily looked around. He noticed that Naraku was nowhere in sight and he began to panic until said demon walked into the hollow tree.

"How do you feel, pet? I brought you something to eat."

Sesshoumaru silently took the meat and nibbled on it without asking what it was. He could only eat a few bites until he felt nauseous. The kumo took it from him and gave him some water to drink. The younger male laid back down and slowly the emotional pain took away the sick feeling that he felt.

Tears prickled at the corners of the inu's eyes. Naraku noticed and he delicately wiped them away. "Don't cry, love..."

The inu wanted to feel better. Anything but this horrible, desolate feeling. He grabbed the hand that wiped his tears away and he brought it to his face, craving its touch.

Naraku studied the inu's face; he saw the pain there and he desperately wanted to take it away. All thoughts fled from his brain and he found himself leaning over, pressing his lips against those of Sesshoumaru's in a slow, but sweet kiss. The inu responded to the kiss almost immediately, and he drank in the kumo's talented lips. The hand that Sesshoumaru cradled eventually cupped the younger demon's face.

Sesshoumaru's arms snaked around Naraku and tugged him hard, which caused the kumo to topple on top of him. Naraku tried to pull away, but the inu wouldn't let him. He deepened the kiss and his arms wrapped tightly around the larger male. Even though he was underneath Naraku, the inu clearly dominated the passionate kiss. While adhering to instinct or his own personal desire, Sesshoumaru rolled his hips, grinding his arousal against the older male.

The spider pulled his mouth away to breath, he panted and stared down at the incredibly sexy Sesshoumaru. His silver hair spread around like a messy, yet mystic halo. "I'm going to stop before I do something to you that we'll both regret."

"No. I want to feel you. All of you." Sesshoumaru huskily whispered, his voice thick with need.

That seemed to convince Naraku. "As you wish. You don't have to do anything. I'm going to make you feel good."

Naraku straddled Sesshoumaru and kissed his lips, his eyelids, his forehead. He kissed him all over his face and then he started kissing down his neck, which he started to nibble and suck, leaving a trail of love marks. Large hands untied Sesshoumaru's obi, and then pulled the inu's kimono top off from his shoulders. Every inch of skin that was revealed was made love to by Naraku's very talented lips and tongue. Every sensual moan that was wrought from the inu's lips both further aroused and encouraged the kumo to proceed in his claiming.

The spider demon licked a dusky pink nipple and nibbled on it until it was fully erect. He kissed his way to the other nipple and sucked on it tenderly until it, too, was hard. His hands touched, caressed wherever he kissed, sucked, licked, or bit.

Naraku's mouth laved its way down Sesshoumaru's six-pack abs until it reached his navel. He dipped his tongue in and smiled when the inu jerked. With a smug grin, he cupped the inu through his pants and rubbed him. Sesshoumaru moaned loudly and instinctively thrusted his hips into that hand.

"You want more?"Naraku inquired in a low growl, and when the inu nodded, he quickly, but gently pulled off the younger demon's white hakama. The half-breed took a moment to admire the erect organ that had sprung free from the confines of Sesshoumaru's pants. It was angry looking and was already seeped with pre-cum. Without another word, he licked the head of the inu's cock. He chuckled when the inu gasped and jerked his hips. Red eyes avidly watched the aroused inu's face as he licked the head again, but more slowly this time. The kumo could faintly taste the dog demon's seed on his tongue and he decided that he liked the taste. It tasted so much better than anyone else he had ever sampled before.

The kumo wanted more.

Naraku brought two fingers to Sesshoumaru's mouth and ordered in a low voice, "Suck." The beautiful inu, too distracted to rebel, immediately opened his mouth and started sucking on his fingers in a crude representation of oral sex.

The pain in the inu's mind, and in his chest was forgotten for the time being. It was replaced by desire and pleasure. His entire body was hot and taut, yet even though he knew he wanted some kind of relief from it, he still wasn't sure exactly what he should be ask for. All his inner youki instructed him to do was to submit like a bitch. He wasn't sure what that meant exactly, but he was willing to submit to anything the kumo wanted.

While Sesshoumaru was sucking his fingers, Naraku chose that moment to engulf Sesshoumaru's dick into his mouth. He took in inch by inch until he had the dog's penis completely down his throat. The inu moaned sensually, but didn't stop sucking on his fingers. Naraku started mimicking what the inu was doing to his fingers and he even hummed a bit to stimulate him even more.

Naraku pulled his fingers from the inu's mouth and positioned one at the inu's puckered entrance. He easily slipped one finger inside and was almost surprised to find barely any resistance. He slipped another finger in and carefully stretched him. When he was sure Sesshoumaru could handle another, he slid a third finger in and gingerly stretched him with all three fingers.

Sesshoumaru was too distracted by the hot mouth that suckled his cock that he barely acknowledged being fingered. He did notice, however, when the kumo pulled his mouth away with a wet pop! and even though it wasn't painful, the stretching was a tad bit uncomfortable. The inu nearly screamed when those fingers brushed against a bundle of nerves that he never knew even existed. He rolled his hips, trying to encourage those fingers to touch his sweet spot again. He whined when those fingers left his body and he glared at Naraku, his yellow eyes hungry and angry. He growled when he heard the older male chuckle.

"So sexy..." Naraku rumbled while he ran his fingertips teasingly from the inu's chest, down to his stomach, and then down to one of his thighs, where his hand stopped abruptly. It pleased him immensely that the inu eagerly arched his body to the kumo's touch. They both had needs, he knew, and it was time for them both to meet them. "...you should see yourself all sprawled out on my bed, dripping with need. But not for long. I will have you in rapture."

Sesshoumaru shivered at those words, but not from fear. He lust glazed golden eyes were half-lidded and he was already panting. The inu's excitement mounted as he watched the other demon strip himself completely of his clothes. He liked the predatory look of Naraku as the kumo crawled over him. The inu groaned when Naraku's hot, yet smooth skin pressed against his own and somehow, the weight of the kumo's hard body pressing him into the bed was comforting.

Naraku kissed and nipped at the inu's ear while he asked for the inu's consent, "are you ready? Do you want this?"

"Yes."

The kumo kissed him hard on the lips and then reluctantly pulled away so he could position his body in-between Sesshoumaru's long legs. He used his hands to bend the inu's legs and guided them as spread apart as he could get them without hurting the dog. "I need you to relax, precious. It will hurt at first, but it will get better."

Naraku used his hand to help position his weeping erection at the Sesshoumaru's entrance and his other hand gripped the inu's thigh to brace himself. The kumo leaned over and hungrily devoured the youkai's mouth as the blunt head of his cock pushed past the resisting muscle.

Sesshoumaru groaned into the kumo's mouth, but he remembered what he was told, so he relaxed himself as much as he could despite the intense stretching pain. A hand wrapped around the inu's neglected arousal and stroked it, which helped lessen the pain by distracting it with pleasure.

Inch by inch, the kumo slid himself in until he was sheathed to the hilt. He hissed and couldn't believe how tight the younger male was. It took all his will power to wait for the inu youkai to adjust to his girth. He knew that for a virgin, which Sesshoumaru undoubtedly was, taking his size had to be very painful.

When Sesshoumaru bucked his hips, Naraku knew it was the signal for him to move. He pulled out almost all the way out and slid back in. He gradually pushed himself in and out several times just to get the inu used to it. He pulled out and only left the head inside, then he angled it just right so that he rammed back inside, hitting the inu's sweet spot hard.

Sesshoumaru cried out, the white hot pleasure shot through him, causing him to arch his back and rock his hips. He wrapped his legs around the kumo's waist and pulled him closer. He rocked his body, meeting each thrust, and moaned endlessly, which encouraged his dark-haired lover to fuck him harder, faster into the bed. The inu raked his claws down the kumo's back when he had rammed into him particularly hard.

"Bitch..." The spider demon grunted, but didn't stop moving; instead, he leaned in closer and licked the inu's neck before he sank his fangs deeply into it. The sadistic part of him enjoyed the gasp of pain that had emerged from the inu's parted lips.

"Fucker..." Sesshoumaru snarled, but the maschochistic part of himself had enjoyed it, though.

One of Naraku's hands pumped Sesshoumaru's cock in time with his thrusts while his other hand found the inu's hand. The spider laced their fingers together as they climbed to the heights of their passion. He knew that neither one of them would last very long. He felt the familiar coil in his stomach, which told him he was close to the edge. The kumo pumped the inu's cock faster since he was determined to have him release before he did.

"Cum for me, Sesshoumaru..." Naraku whispered, kissing and sucking on the inu's body while he drove himself into the younger demon's body, hitting his sweet spot over and over again. The inu's moans and cries escalated with each thrust into his tight body and he clenched Naraku's hand more tightly in his own. Each time he was driven into, he was brought closer and closer to his release.

With a throaty, breathy moan, Sesshoumaru's eyes rolled into the back of his head as he came, his seed spilling between them and his muscles clenching down on Naraku's engorged, thrusting cock. Naraku growled, and rocked into the inu a few more times until he was forced to cum as well. With one last thrust, he released his seed deep within his silver lover's body.

Naraku gingerly pulled out and collapsed right next to Sesshoumaru on his bed. They both laid panting for awhile as they tried to catch their breath. As soon as the spent inu calmed down enough, he snuggled up to the kumo's side, resting his head on the older man's chest as he threw an arm around him and a leg. He looked as if he were silently staking a claim on Naraku.

"You make a lot of noise, Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru growled and bit into the kumo's chest. "Shut up."

The kumo chuckled, "Don't be ashamed. It is damned sexy. That's why I didn't kiss you most of the time. I loved hearing your wanton moans and seeing just what kind of noises I could wring out of you."

The silver-haired beauty rolled his eyes and snuggled even closer, if that were possible, into the other male's body. "I love you...even though you are an asshole."

"And I love you, even though you're an insatiable bitch."

What happened next surprised them both:

Instead of hitting Naraku, as was expected...

Sesshoumaru kissed him.

~*~*~*~*~*~

As always, time passed as it ultimately did. Sesshoumaru had his good days, and his bad days, but he still moved on. There was still a long, arduous road for Sesshoumaru to travel, but it was welcome. For as long as Naraku was with him, he knew that he could overcome anything. It had always been in Naraku where he had found his true strength.

Strength was always taught as something that is self-obtained and something that must be depended on alone. Sesshoumaru always thought he was weak for depending on his parents, and on Naraku, most of all. But he learned that he was wrong. It is always in others, the ones we love, that we find our true strength.

And with that newfound strength, Sesshoumaru found himself at the gates of Izayoi's home. Naraku stood right beside him, as always.

"Naraku?"

"Yes, my sexy mate?"

Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes. He was sore enough already as it were from his mate's voracious lust. "Did you ever find your mother?"

Naraku nodded and said quietly, "I found her grave. She was buried next to my father."

The new taiyoukai looked at his mate, sympathy gracing the edge of his voice. "I see. So...you're an orphan now, like I am."

"Looks that way."

They were both silent for a few minutes as they stared at the castle that housed Izayoi and her infant son.

"Sesshoumaru, are you ready for this?" Naraku asked, concerned laced in his voice and wine-colored eyes.

Sesshoumaru looked at him and nodded, "InuYasha is my little brother. He is my family, just as you are my family. The past is the past. I am ready for the future. I will not abandon him, and neither will I abandon you."

And with those words, the taiyoukai and hanyou headed towards the castle to meet Lady Izayoi and InuYasha.

**[:Owari:]**


End file.
